Yes...you are right..I started writing. That means that my mind is turbulent. I have seen many people till this moment of my life and people had different concept and different out look for the so called “life”. For some, family is their life..for some friends… and for majority, their own individualism. The last group, are very much biased to wards ones own rights and think that their wrongs are also right. They see this individualism as a religion and live for that, no matter they hurt others, make others cry or ironically make others laugh… Feelings for others are just like a old rusted pick up truck in the neighbor’s garage….That means, that they don’t care for it.

I am a person who belongs to the first group which I said in the first paragraph. I live for my family… I had sacrificed many things for my family because I know, where I am now and I am very much aware that, its because of my family. I know what bonding means..and bonding stays lively on expectations. This might sound you ironical but internally bonding, love, affection and care are tied together with expectations. If you don’t have expectations on a relations, you cant love that relation and if you care for some one, then you do that with some expectation…. If some one tell you, that he or she doesn’t care for you, as an ordinary human, can you care for him/her? You might tell that, you are so ideal and you never expects any thing from relations and you are so great that you just think about what you are giving and not what you are getting from others…absolute shit.. never ever it happens like that. As the saying goes “Secrets are not always secret”; secrets can have the mask of frustration, sadness or some un fulfilled expectations. These frustrations dwindle and just goes on dwindling till it breaks or till it comes out…. Breaking refers to the shattering of the soul and escaping out refers to successfully coming out of the tensions and this frustrations. People find different ways to hide this frustrations; one by calling themselves crazy… and they fear of sharing their frustration or feelings; these people are really cowards; and these people screw their whole life. Frustrations become maggots and they emerge out of the dead mind. Why this term coward is used here? Those people feel too insecure in this world and trust is just another English word to them. They feel that revealing their frustration as revealing their weak points. Those people very well know that they have a bad ego. Those people express themselves to the world as strong beings, but its just the opposite. I don’t think, these people could handle pressure. To escape out of these maggots, there comes a beautiful relation; people call this as “friend”. Every one have their own bad times and good times. It feels great to share those with your best’est’ friend. (Borrowing this non English term from one of my friend, I like this word very much). Its very difficult to identify a friend as the beste’est’. I feel that sharing your feelings with that person helps you a lot to come out of depression and frustration and of course you feel so special to that person and other way also. But in this world, there are only very few people who are so lucky to have such a relation whome you could trust.

I don’t know what was the purpose of this whole passage……